4 truths you need to know about life after speech therapy and what to do instead

Published by Paige Smith on 15/02/2024

Beneath Your Stutter Podcast

Do you remember how you felt after speech therapy? If you were anything like me, I felt like I was on top of the world, finally free from stuttering and proud of my hard-earned fluency. And then, somewhere down the line things went side-ways, and I came crashing down and faced the harsh reality…

…I still stuttered, if not the same, maybe even worse!

Before speech therapy, the pressure, stress and anxiety I felt everyday was about ‘stop stuttering’. But once I learned the fluency techniques, I felt a new type of pressure of ‘maintaining fluency’.

Does this scenario sound familiar to you? No matter which side of the coin I was on, I still felt the pressure, stress and anxiety within myself.

In this blog post, I’m sharing with you a few hard truths and what I wish I knew after speech therapy. But first, let me take you through a bit more of my own relapse experience.

Believe me, I've been there…

Within months after speech therapy, I found myself struggling. I was stuttering again and desperately trying to maintain what fluency I had left. To be honest, I was devastated. The 3-week intensive clinic that I’d experienced was grueling.

I was so disheartened for my stuttering to return after all the hard work I’d put in. I thought going to speech therapy had fixed it. I thought I had it all under control. But it’s no wonder I was feeling anxious, frustrated and disappointed!

With stuttering coming back, it felt like I’d taken not one, but many steps backwards. But even with the fluency-shaping tools and techniques, I didn’t understand why I couldn’t execute and make them work for me in the real world. And then it became a vicious cycle, feeling guilt and shame for not even wanting to use them.

Even though in my mind I knew I could go back and get more help, I had this limiting belief that the people at the speech therapy program would be disappointed in me. That somehow I was not living up to their expectations. I felt like such a failure for needing help again.

Does any of this sound like de ja vu?

So, what exactly is a relapse?

The term "relapse" is used in both medical and non-medical contexts. In a medical context, "relapse" typically refers to the return or worsening of symptoms after a period of improvement or recovery from a medical condition.

In the context of stuttering, the term "relapse" is used to describe the recurrence or return of stuttering behaviors after a period of improvement, such as after speech therapy.

The real numbers

During my intensive program, I remember learning the fluency-shaping techniques and producing fluent speech for the first time in my life, within a very short amount of time. It was amazing! But as I mentioned earlier, my fluency started to go downhill, within weeks after the program.

In my research, I came across a survey done by the National Stuttering Association. It found that ‘84% experienced a relapse after improving their fluency with speech therapy.’

At this really high rate of relapse, it suggests that my losing fluency was maybe the ‘norm’ and not the exception. But of course at the time, I didn’t know that. I saw losing fluency as proof that I was a failure, and I hated failing!

With stuttering relapses, sometimes it happens suddenly, shaking the foundation of newfound fluency…like getting a hard block that comes out of nowhere

But more often than not, it occurs gradually within weeks or months after speech therapy. There are many other factors at play, but it’s usually a slow erosion of skills, motivation and confidence.

The 4 truths you need to know about life after speech therapy

TRUTH #1 - Constantly using fluency-shaping techniques is difficult and exhausting to maintain

After any kind of speech therapy program or course, you’ve been told that you should be using your fluency tools and techniques at all times. Sounds like a good plan, but the reality is this. It’s just cognitively exhausting to always be focused on the mechanics of producing fluent speech. The energy it takes for most people is unsustainable — as you’re back into life full swing with jobs, school, deadlines, taking care of kids, and so much more. I know how easy it can be for fluency maintenance to take a back seat. So instead of an all or nothing approach, here’s a solution:

First, take the pressure off yourself to be working on your speech — all. the. time. Instead of a regimented routine of doing speaking drills for an X amount of hours per day, try this: Give yourself specific speaking challenges throughout the day executing on what you’ve learned: this allows you to see what works, what doesn’t, adjust and try again.

TRUTH #2 - Using certain fluency techniques may make your speech sound unnatural and unacceptable

After learning speech shaping and fluency techniques, you now realize they make you sound a lot like a robot or zombie. Who knew fluency could sound so weird? If you did group speech therapy, it’s OK if you sound slow and mechanical — because so does everybody else!

I remember how hard it was taking a new way of speaking out into the real world. It’s no wonder that many individuals go back to stuttering, rather than talk in such a consciously controlled manner. So instead of the cure feeling worse than the disease, here’s a solution:

Give yourself a real chance to get a feel for a rate of speech that feels good to you. If your speech is sounding flat, it may take learning to play around with your voice, creating inflections with your voice that go up and down in a melodic way. There is no right or wrong way, just exploring and coming to what sounds (and feels good) to you.

TRUTH #3 - It’s easier than you realize to slip back into familiar speaking patterns and conditioned behaviors

Speech therapy techniques are usually learned in a controlled and safe environment, much different than the unpredictable nature of our world. So when stress triggers old behaviours (and this is pretty much a guarantee to happen) this can easily start to erode any gains you made in speech therapy.

You cannot underestimate the complex challenge of replacing old behaviors and integrating new ones, for it to become the new natural and automatic reflex. Surrounded by the same friends and family, it might be easy to get triggered and reverting back to old patterns.

It’s no wonder that many individuals, including myself, eventually reverted back to old patterns and behaviors…because they’re easy and familiar to default to. So instead of beating yourself up for not being strong enough, here’s a solution:

Forgive yourself and try again. It can be hard to stay motivated keeping up the fluency techniques, when you have a hard time transferring them to the real world. But keep honing and practicing the skills on your own — recommitting to the process, over and over again.

TRUTH #4 - Familiar negative thoughts and feelings can come flooding back — both in how you feel about yourself and challenging speaking situations

When I went for speech therapy, I don’t remember anyone caring enough to ask how I felt or concerned to know my thoughts about my experience with stuttering. Perhaps it’s underestimated what kind of an internal struggle occurs when a person attempts to change thoughts and behaviors that have prevailed for so long.

Shortly upon returning home from the clinic, I fell into an overpowering sense of alienation and isolation. Even with the fluency skills in hand, I still felt very alone in the process of working on my speech to maintain fluency. I found myself thinking the same thoughts and feeling the same feelings as before — difficult to change them or make them stop. These feelings were overwhelming and I didn’t know how to deal with them.

So what's the solution? If I was to do it over, I would make sure to have the right support system in place. At the time, I tended to bottle up my feelings, especially if they were negative, not wanting to be a burden or let anyone know how I really felt. But that’s exactly what I needed to do…to talk about my feelings and to feel that I wasn’t alone on my journey.

3 more things to know after speech therapy (which I only wish I knew)

#1 - Acknowledge the different levels where stuttering impacts you

With speech therapy, it mainly focused on the mechanics. Stuttering is a complex disorder, as it impacts you on a physiological and psychological level.

What I wish I knew was that I needed to also put my focus to shifting my deeply held thoughts and beliefs about stuttering and myself.

#2 - Understand that achieving fluency in speech is a dynamic process

With speech therapy, the message is to keep practicing and applying learned techniques in various situations. Achieving and maintaining speech fluency is an ongoing process, not an overnight success.

What I wish I knew was how to adjust and adapt to challenging speaking moments, as a bad speech day would totally derail my efforts.

#3 - Stuttering setbacks are temporary, not permanent

In speech therapy, the goal was achieving fluency as fast as possible and making as few stuttering mistakes, as this was seen as success. Through the learning process, there’s the inevitable back and forth of making mistakes, as you’re mastering a new skill.

What I wish I knew was that my rigid, perfectionist black and white thinking was not allowing me to see my imperfect effort as progress.

A stuttering relapse is not the end

Know there is life after speech therapy, and it may not be what you expected. If you experience a stuttering relapse, it can feel like a setback, a return to those familiar frustrations and self-doubts.

But remember, recovery from stuttering is a journey. And who knows, maybe setbacks and relapses are just a natural part of the process. A relapse does not have to be absolute, it’s not the end.

In my experience, here’s what I’ve learned…

No matter where you are on your journey, know you can always get back on track to fluency.